Culinary Mishaps
by genocideray
Summary: Tieria asks Lockon to look after his cake mix. A disaster ensues.


**Culinary Mishaps**

"Tieria Erde, please report to dock four immediately. Tieria Erde, please report to dock four immediately." The pleasant, female intercom voice announced. Tieria, standing at the kitchenette in the lounge of the Ptolemaios, looked up with a barely perceptible trace of annoyance. He looked down at the beater which was whisking the egg mixture cheerfully. _Damn._

He turned around and looked critically at the rest of the people in the room. There was Lockon, playing with Haro in the most ridiculous manner possible, Setsuna, who was working out with a ferocious look of concentration fixed to his face and Sumeragi, who was downing alcohol and scribbling furiously on her electronic notepad. The only person he could trust with looking after the mixture was in dock four as well, and he knew the egg foam would collapse if he stopped it now. He almost nearly sighed inwardly, but he suppressed the emotion.

"Lockon."

The Irish man looked up, "Yep?"

"I'm going over to dock four for a while. Could you please look after this—"Tieria gestured to the bowl, "and—"

"I can't cook!" Lockon protested.

Haro bleeped and bobbed up and down, repeating after Lockon, "Can't cook! Can't cook! ", till Lockon smacked him on his head.

"It's really quite simple. Once the egg whites are stiff, just fold in the flour slowly. I'll be right back, so don't worr—"

"Tieria Erde, please report to dock four immediately. Tieria Erde, please report to dock four immediately."

"I have to go. Just do as I told you. It'll be fine." Tieria insisted as he turned and left.

"Uh-huh. " Lockon said, "Once the egg whites are stiff, fold in the….something. Right." Lockon peered curiously at the white froth forming in the mixer. After a while, he stopped the mixer and poked it with a finger. It yielded easily to his finger.

"How's _that_ ever going to be stiff?" he muttered.

"How's what going to be stiff?" Lockon turned to look at Sumeragi, who had come up behind him and was staring at the mixture with equal , if not more, interest.

"Don't you cook?" He asked as he activated the mixer.

Sumeragi shot him a look of surprise. "Why should I? There's always food available everywhere. At any rate, _you_ don't cook."

"Yes, but you're, well a…." he took a look at her venomous face and shut up at once.

"A woman?" She supplied sweetly. "How incurably male chauvinistic, you pig, Lockon Stratos."

"Chauvinist pig! Chauvinist pig!" Haro proclaimed.

"Hey!" Lockon protested at once, swinging around to bat the mischievous robot, but it had found safe harbour in Setsuna's arms.

"What are you making?" The Kurdish boy asked, his reddish brown eyes exhibiting a rarely-seen innocence.

"I'm not making anything. I'm helping Tieria look after his egg-white mixture." Lockon replied, leaning on the kitchenette counter. There was an loud, annoyed throat-clearing from the door.

"'Looking after' implies looking, you do realise, Lockon Stratos?" Tieria stood at the door, glaring disapprovingly at them, with Allelujah trying his to keep a straight face at the ridiculous scene before him.

Lockon looked like a guilty child caught by his teacher doing something naughty.

Tieria marched forward and looked down at the dried-up frothy mixture. "Lockon Stratos! I _told _you to stop mixing and fold in the flour when the mixture was stiff!" He pulled the whisk out, with the dried egg foam clinging miserably to the metal. "_How_ am I supposed to make angel cake with _this_? You! You are _not fit_ to be a baker!" He shook the whisk aggressively at Lockon, splattering him with egg foam. Allelujah bit his lip to keep from laughing aloud, while Setsuna watched on in almost-amusement.

Lockon held his hands up in protest from the rain of egg-white flecks, "How was I supposed to know what 'stiff' meant? I'm a terrorist warrior, not a housewife!"

The mixing bowl got up-ended over his head by Sumeragi. "Chauvinist Pig! Chauvinist Pig!" Haro cheered happily.

**THE END**


End file.
